June 18, 2020
Empty. Bored. Distracting myself with thoughts of jobs and careers. I want nothing in both senses. This journaling satisfies me. Writing does. I collected my autobiographical stuff to start writing on the Renzi inspired sketch. The goal is to retain spirit and spontaneity. A sense of unmediated voice. I’ll need to fill in the gaps. Like walking through an architect’s storage. The feeling of a notebook.
I have two possibilities: one I don’t want and the other makes me unwelcome.
Does it make me unwelcome?
I want to belong. Solidarity. Struggle against power. I am power. I fight myself.
Tonight, I’m not watching a movie. No Youtube. Stay off the phone.
I’ve had an idea for a short story using the form of a white paper. A business model for an online conflict casino. There is an app.
Short stories live when we make them into movies
I saw the moth. Hemispherical head smooth and white like a space helmet, wings powdered like icing sugar. I turned on the tap. The water swept it away. I tried to save it with my fingers and then let it swirl down the drain. As a kid, I would never turned on the tap.
Article Idea: Simon Leys: People I disagree with in every way but write so well I believe I would like them as individuals.
